Sentences from real Craig's List ads.
"It's been brought to my attention that I probably won't "catch a man" ... with 300 penguins and a bunch of purple furniture around."
"This kitty has a very soft and furry belly, like a teddy bear - however he will bite your face if you try to touch it."
"Do you have a small, incontinent dog? ... I have a package of small doggy diapers. Please don't try to put them on a cat. It won't work."
"I am willing to rent out my bathroom ... My bathroom is large. You can easily put a twin air mattress in there. I only ask that when I need to use the bathroom, you or your air mattress are not in it."
(Via Tim Blair)